A Kind Release

Many elite New Yorkers were shocked when Ronald Reagan was re-elected by a landslide in 1984. He won every state except Minnesota - Walter Mondale's home state - and Washington, D.C. The term Reagan Democrats evolved from this phenomenal result of traditional Democrats defecting to vote for a Republican candidate in huge numbers. Just as film critic Pauline Kael was shocked at Richard Nixon's election because no one she knew had voted for him, many of the urban intelligentsia were stunned at the popularity of a man Clark Clifford once described as, "an amiable dunce." Reagan bore the brunt of criticism from the press who called him a simplistic buffoon. He ignored advisers who insisted that he be more conciliatory toward the Soviet Union and went ahead and called it, "an evil empire." He was exactly what he said he was and that is the reason Ronald Reagan was popular. He struck a chord with people from all walks of life. He was a great communicator who took his message directly to the people of America, and they loved him for it. My mother-in-law was a Southern Democrat who voted for George Wallace in 1968. She didn't vote for Reagan the first time in 1980, but he grew on her. I remember her admiring a picture of Reagan chopping wood on his ranch and remarking what a fine looking president we had. She lived with us from 1980 to 1982, and then she moved back to Florida. She came to live with us again in 1996 and stayed till she passed away in 2000 suffering from the same dreadful disease that killed one of our finest presidents of the 20th century. Had Reagan passed away soon after he wrote his farewell letter addressed to "my fellow Americans," in which he said he would be going into the sunset of his life, I would be mourning his death and weeping all the day long. But I know what this horrific malady did to Reagan and to his family. Reagan's death after 10 years battling Alzheimer's is a kind release from a cruel disease that kills the mind and leaves only an empty shell as a grim reminder of a loved one. Thank you, Nancy Reagan, for safeguarding your husband's dignity from the prying eyes of a hostile press, for surely these last years could not have been kind. I thought of you often and what you were going through as you watched the love of your life go into a place you could not follow. When I read his letters to you in the book, "I love you, Ronnie," I knew that the love you had for him must have made every day torturous. In that last letter to us, Reagan wrote: "Unfortunately, as Alzheimer's disease progresses, the family often bears a heavy burden. I only wish there was some way I could spare Nancy from this painful experience." As her primary caregiver, I watched my mother-in-law, who had been a beautiful, smart woman, morph into a helpless infant who drank from a baby bottle because she could no longer hold a cup upright. Her dead eyes recognized no one, and she reacted only by instinct when food was placed before her or when she had her clothing and diapers changed. I wish I could say I did this as lovingly as possible but I am not a saint. As difficult as this time may have been, my respect, admiration, and love for my husband grew even stronger as I watched him care so tenderly for his mother. In its final stages, the burden of the disease is on the victim's family, who has to deal with the care of the human being they knew. Ronald Reagan may have breathed his last on Saturday, June 5, 2004, but the president we knew and loved died a long, long time ago. But now is not the time to dwell on his passing but to be eternally grateful and remember all that this great man did for the country. Think of the words that have become obsolete because of his presidency - the Soviet Union, the Berlin Wall, and the Cold War. My childhood was dominated by the threat of a nuclear attack by the Soviet Union, which had promised to bury us. The Reagan /Bush administrations ended that nightmare, and inspired hope and a great morning for America. Although he was not a perfect man, he always took responsibility for his mistakes. The world grudgingly admired him even as they bitterly disagreed with him, and our stature as a powerful nation in the hands of a strong moral leader was never higher. He was a man who never worried about his legacy because he knew that what he was doing was right for his beloved country. "When the Lord calls me home, whenever that may be, I will leave with the greatest love for this country of ours and eternal optimism for its future." God bless him.